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"You knew full well the squid was there, but you kept going anyway." - Duncan
"I'm getting the feeling that any time I start a sentence with 'Not to be an arrogant bastard'... I'm being an arrogant bastard." - Griff
"Oh, now it's raining bacon on the nuns!" - Leo Laporte, Munchcast
"The killing. I wants it." - Lillia
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"...and that's how you do a sheep." - Violet
"You know, not everyone has the refinement of the Tadcasters." - Jacob
"Refinement? What's he referring to? ... If I find out that some of you have refinement, I'll turn this car around and go straight home!" - ir
"I may have had a few huge margaritas." - Lillia
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lillia: "It's like beating up a one-armed midget."
ir: "That's... that's just so wrong. Even that such a comparison exists is wrong."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"...and then he's full-grown by Easter. ... Hey! Christ is like a sea-monkey!" - Izzy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"'I have brought diet virgins'? Tastes great! Less filling!" - Marion
"Did you say 'diabolical schlong'?" - Siobhan
"Because if you have emotions, getting hit with a water cannon really sucks." - Davius
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'd probably get 'No, Jupiter's rising. You're an *ss.'" - Caine
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Annys [whispering to Ian]: "What's... f-o-c-e-s?"
ir: [types an 'r', making it 'forces']
Annys: "Oh, I get a quote, because you can't spell?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Sniff my labor." - Danabren
Kat: "Stop grinding my sister."
De Castellan: "I wasn't grinding her. If I were grinding her, I'd be doing this."
Kat: "I'm just watching her facial expression to see if it's real."
"All right. Eep. Although that wasn't my *ss." - Griff
"I just put my hand in something sticky." - Merricke
"Is she a dirty girl?" - Michel
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Merricke: "I dated something from that town once."
Siobhan: "Something?"
Merricke: "Let me put it this way: I lost my virginity to her, and I wanted it back."
Siobhan: "Excuse me, Ian... I have to feel your shirt."
Lissa: "Suddenly, I want to feel him, too!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I expect you to be devious. You're Tadcaster, that's in your job description..." - Malcom
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"We have bored mountain goats? [Bruni repeats herself] I'm still geting mountain goats." - Griff
"You aren't in my world." - Lissa
"And we still don't have mountain goats." - Bruni
"Ian! She wounded my inner child!"- Griff
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Griff: "Have you met Wu Ping, our Chinese farmer?"
Kat: "How does she grow Chinese people?"
"Great. Armageddon comes on the wings of a flying squirrel with a 'parachute'." - Marion
"...I leaned over there and heard 'My titanium has a nice patina'. So I came over here." - Kat
"Ugh, making a turducken in a women's prison." - Kat
"...then we'll milk the turkey, and there you are." - delbroc
"You need to ask your rabbi where turkey mammaries are, for clarification." - DeCastellan
"It's probably that thing in the butt that no one knows what it's for." - Kat
"I'm practicing deep uterine breathing." - Marion
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I needed dooooonut. *ss happy." - Lillia
"I can't get past the problem of a marital aid labelled 'Milwaukee' down the side." - ir
"This conversation went wrong, didn't it?" - Lillia
"...but you need to get the draw-cut [gestures] at the end." - Lillia
"Mm, she's rubbing up on my thigh." - Nigel
"Not a thigh! NOT A THIGH!" - ir, as Lillia
"And thank you for that." - Nigel
"I happy kitchen puppet." - Lissa
Robert: "I saw movement under the table there, but it's just Malcolm. [everyone looks at Malcolm, who is not under table]
Malcolm: "It's not me."
Robert: "Yeah, it's Malcolm under there."
Berric: "Dude, I'm not Malcolm."
Teo: "You guys want pillows under there?"
Lissa: "No... but we would like some toys to play with."
[Someone points at Berric, references Malcolm]
Alys: "What's it going to take to stop people confusing you with Malcolm tonight?"
Berric: "I know! I'm much better looking than that man."
Lissa: "Wellll..."
Lissa: "Self-sufficiency is good."
Lillia: "Do you need batteries?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Mmmm... nuts..." - Lissa
"I'm not sayin' nothin' about your cream-to-mouth technique" - Collin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Dude, where's my car?" - DeCastellan
"Bruno has a butt-flask!" - Lillia
"How many points do you get for nipple stalking?" - Lissa
"I am stern-ness itself. Grrr." - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You people touch waaay more than I'm used to." - Josh
[muttering] "As long as I get my sausage, that's all I care about..." - Melchior
"'Blazing Barney.' You heard correctly." - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Griff, to Merricke: "Have fun storming the girlfriend!"
Collin: "Give him 10 minutes."
"Ian's hiding behind the truth." - Merricke
Marshal: "Bear you any steel in an offensive manner?"
Fighter: "No! This man is my brother."
Mathilde: "At least he didn't say 'This man is my sister'. That'd have been weird."
Griff: "My, aren't we spry."
HRM Andreas: "Hey! I'm gonna stand outside *your* list and make comments now."
ir: "Yeah, but no one's ever accused Griff of being 'spry'."
"Nah, it's cool. When I'm all geeked up, I can't expect to hit you with a perfect shot. I figured, you didn't take it, it must have sucked." - Sir Conrad
"Is there hair product in your eyes?" - Jarl Thorson
Darius, swearing fealty: "I am your servant... I love what you love. I hate what you hate - "
HRM Andreas: "I hate lima beans."
Darius: "Easy so far, Sire."
"Are there spears for this man? [laughs] Spurs! Spurs." - HRM Andreas
"I blame Tadcaster. [pause] I'm over it." - ir
"'Guns & Ammo! Wedding Services!' ... Wha?" - Griff
Griff, as Collin: "Oh, look! Niagra!"
Griff, as Griff: "No. Eff you."
"That's faaar." - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"..and that's like throwing a wounded squirrel on a fire-ant colony." - Merricke, Master of Analogy(tm)
delbruc: "You want the truth??"
ir, teabagging chair: "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Anyone who stands in front of me and blocks my view of my hunny fighting is going to take it up the *ss with my crutch." - Katryne
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Non, you listen, but you don't understand. That's different." - Bruni, to Alain
"She touched her, uh... OK, how this story started..." - Merricke
Vi: "Yeah! I wanna go to a 'boy's night out', too."
Lissa: "Yeah! Me too!"
Griff: "But you can't. You don't have the dangly parts."
Lissa: "I could buy some!"
"Heavy lesbian undertow?" - Merricke
"I would buy dangly-bits for a trip to Vegas." - Lissa
"That's something else I shouldn't have said, huh?" - Lissa
"You should probably stop letting me kick you in the crotch!" - Griff, as Niki
"Decrepit... muppet... dildo?" - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Chinese fighting butter." - Merricke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I said I can't eat PEANUTS." - Bruno
"And the French woman is telling you to ar-tic-u-late." - Griff
"It'll hurt less if you don't struggle." - Merricke
"He's great! Just ask me." - Merricke, as parent of hypothetical job interviewee
"He can't eat penis, but he's seen Caine's?" - Griff
"'Penis' is good, what's wrong with 'penis'? [singing] Pe-NIS!" - Griff
ir: "Do large amounts of alcohol help with that?"
Niki: "With the sucking?"
[gestures] "Chinese fighting butter." - Merricke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Griff: "Well...it's better than that...that thing you read!"
ir: "That thing I read?? ... Some people call it the BI-BUL."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Siobhan: "Atlantians get upset when they don't have cabins."
ir: "Cabbages??"
"I don't swallow. ... Oh, screw you all!" - Lissa
[singing] "Hoff Pockets!" - Griff
ir: "Ha! Ron Howard's CONAN..."
Merricke: "...starring Tom Hanks."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Tadcaster cat is watching your vegan pornz" - Mateo
"What, do they eat tofu off the bodies of unshaven hippies?" - Mateo, in reference to 'vegan porn'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"...and the next you know, it's between her legs, and it's pushing her along." - Griff
Bruno: "How did Griff's nipples get involved?"
Berrick: "What part of 'this is Tadcaster' do you not understand?"
"What are you milking?" - Lissa
"Squirrel?" - ir, Merricke, Siobhan
Collin: "I said 'scroll', and four people HORd urk..."
Everyone: "HORd? Bwahahahahahahaha"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Damn nekkid Frenchists." - Bruni
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"No one promised me scrotal lesions and tea when I went into science." - Lilia
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Higher... more pressure... Ohhhh.... that felt so good! You made it pop all the way down!" - Merricke
Violet: "Is Andre groping her?"
Lillia: " Gropey sword!"
"Do you need a pump for that? 'Cause I did!" - Lillia
"Best friends sometimes turn into amazing turds." - André
"Let's talk about something less appropriate. Like VD." - Merricke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Don't hug me right now. I have my hand down my pants." - Duncan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Collin: "Well, I'll be 44 in two weeks."
Lillia: "Inches?"
"I judge success by that lip motion." - ir
"If we have to share, it had better be stiff." - Bruni
"Are you being chased by balls?" - Lillia, to Griff
Lillia: "Did you just say 'testiculocks'?"
ir: "Heh. No."
"Don't make me smeek you, Frenchie." - Collin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Izzy: "For one thing, if I had a goat, I could make cheese and soap."
Peyton: "You can make cheese and soap now, and you don't have to deal with goat poop."
"The highways in Rhode Island function like Hogwarts staircases." - Peyton
"Well, thank Peyton's Mom nothing bad happened!" - ir
"Hon, Ian doesn't drink. [pause] Unless it's turkey." - Izzy
Violet: "We need a word for that."
Molly: "We have a word for it...'f*cker'."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"He understood it! There was hand motion to my speaky." - Collin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I opened my mouth, and the words came out. [pause] A lot of people in Tadcaster have that problem." - Annys
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"...But I don't know how the dog feels about it." - Quotes from Pennsic XXXVI
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Something protecting your neck is always a pain in the butt." - Katya
"You worked her so hard, her throat stopped working!" - Katya
"Oh, there would have been chair beatings involved." - Davius
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It's Russian, so it's *leeeetle* weird." - Griff
"Yeah, but it doesn't sound like a lemon..." - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"We're going to sword-fight to the death! And then we'll go out and play catch." - Alys' cousin William
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Do not question the Tuaca!" - Violet, ir
"Is your Don nuts?!" - Severio
"Soft Scrub calls me Hood Ornament." - ir
"Isn't practice for people who don't have their OGR yet?" - someone bearing a pasing resemblance to Jost but who might not have been Jost
"I feel oppressed. Anyone want a banana?" - Lissa
delbruc: "What has two jobs..."
Marion: "...and likes thumbs?"
"For all I know you might have jaws down there." - Andre
"Ok, I'm putting a stop to this monkey sex before it goes to far." - Caine
"Hun, Get your teeth out of my hand." - Andre
"Tadbag him! Quick!" - Bruno
"Don't guzzle the mug!" - Griff
"This one doesn't wiggle enough...I think I burned the one that wiggled enough." - Andre
"This can't end well." - Julianna
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I touched Ian's schwenkle, and his wife saw me!" - Violet
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"You can come with me, I'm gonna go sew grommets on Jill's butt. " - Brin
Nate: "Yeah, it's easier to put them on than to take them off."
ir: "What, boobs?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Fantastik and bacon is not fantasically bacony." - Marion
"Peerage is a happy meal." - Marion, delbruc
"Here's a picture of him trying to pin it not on my t*t." - Marion
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"If someone hits me in the cervix, we have issues." - Marion
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Heh. Meeeed bath." - ir
Gavin: "I have a pump the puts out ten gallons a minute."
Lillia: "You have a pump that pumps ten? Gallons? A minute?"
Bruni & Lillia: "Wowwwww."
Gavin: "You can't drink that fast."
"Everybody's ravaging me! ... Who else wants to ravage me?" - ir
"You need an inappropriate comment... of what nature?" - Bruni
"Geez! I have some shorts you could jump in, if you like." - Griff
"Out Of Context Theatre presents TADCASTER." - Melchior
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm going to suck now, and it's going to make noise." - Griffyn
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"That merits theme music." - Violet
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lissa: "Whose silly string is that?"
Merricke: "It's mine."
Lissa: "I'll give you my virtue for it."
"You don't have to give me a Twizzler to do that." - Kat
"Your Excellencies, I know I'm the Commander of Your Navies and all, but you've gotta stop giving my crew boats!" - Griff
"Do you get a second date if you teabag the cheesbowl?" - Siobhan
"We might have to steal this sh*t!" - Siobhan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Sorry, but the King doesn't pay me to lose like that." - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"WEER IN UR CORTZ, GARDIN UR QUEEN" - Tadguards
"'If you can read this, I'm dead, m'lord.'" - Griff's helm
"It's a big cloak, we could probably make a burrito out of her." - Merricke
"Now, stop right there mister! Spit that queen out of your mouth right now!" - Merricke
"Education is not healthy." - Lissa
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"...Because pink and gelatinous means success." - Bruni
"Nuns don't read romance novels." - Kat
"Square to the sun?" - Duncan
"Bear in mind, there's a lot of vodka in this martini." - Iseault
"I specialize in doing butts!" - Bruni
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Aaaaaaaaaaaa!!! Istvan on a Slip 'n' Slide, gaaaahhhhhh!!!" - Izzy
"OK. There are a number of ways a Bhakail Yule could go badly..." - Jadwiga
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Lube is always better when there's a recipient." - Kat
"After a mass damning, you want to go make comet-balls." - Merricke
Siobhan: "Actually hot tea sounds good."
ir: "She doesn't want any, she just thinks it sounds good."
"You're suddenly the Church? The Church of Amy?" - ir
"That's a thinly-veiled 'eat it or wear it.'" - Merricke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Did Pascual just volunteer to be a really cool prize?" - Katya
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"... you can't be so much like Ajax, you need to be more like... SoftScrub." - HRH Gabrielle, to Raf
"...because I have a fetish for SoftSoap." - Alain
"I hate you." - Raf
"You put the 'SoftScrub' thing in there, didn't you!" - Raf
"I so hate you." - Raf
Raf (to Alain): "I'm gonna get you, and your little dog, too."
Griff: "Would that be Andre?"
"I still can't believe Caine thinks he swallowed his." -ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Uberbuddhalube?" - Bruno
"Dipilitory's... not the same thing as spoogy." - Melchior
"Actually, I said, 'My hair's not palmy.'" - Bruno
"You teabag the goldfish, you don't get the second date." - Merricke
"They get milked by ants!" - Lillia
"The 'ew' is the low-hanging fruit.'" - Merricke
"Executive decision time: I've decided that the phrase, 'And then things went downhill' be stricken from the Tadcaster vocabulary...none of us is allowed to say that anymore. since we start there to begin with anyway. " - ir
Siobhan: "It's 'table toast'."
Violet: "There's no such thing as 'table toast'!"
"Use a fork, it burns less.'" - Lissa
"I knew that one without even knowing.'" - Lillia
What Merricke said: "There's nothing like dumpster-diving at a doctor's college."
What Merricke actually said:"There's nothing like dumpster-diving in Dockers and a collared shirt." And that doesn't make any more sense, now does it.
"Did you say 'anal vise'?'" - Griff
"It's still brown!" - Merricke
"If it makes my mouth happy, that's all that matters." - Katya
"Because 'clavinoid'? That's not a word you hear... ever." - ir
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Bowling for Andre." - Andre
"You were stoned like a sixteen-year-old Iraqi girl!" - Lorenzo
"Two reasons not to let Andre in a no rules melee: 'HULK SMASH!' and 'Zombie fencer!'" - Dark Violet
"Dragon cookie breast." - Collin
"Mmm... tastes like Girl Scouts." - Andre
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dirty Pierre: "That's balls-on accurate."
Kat (to Marion): "That other guy? Guy Smiley? He's balls-on poofta."
Lilly: [paws at tent wall]
Marion: "There's no bathroom in here, you'll have to go outside, hunny."
Lilly: [*paw* *paw*]
Thomas: "Hunny, the door is over on that side."
Thomas: I'm not as think as you drunk, I am!
Tyger (and others in chorus): OH, YES you are!!
JP and delbroc: "VAGITARIAN!"
delbroc: "... I saw that on a T-shirt."
Lilly: "These are people from my barony. This is Cannonball... and Thomas."
Kat (to delbroc): "Did she just introduce me as 'Cannonball'?"
delbroc: "Yes. Yes she did."
"What happened to my underwear?" - Lilly
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ir: [points wordlessly]
Violet:"Yeah, it's a huge-*ss spider."
"Ew!! Crunch!! [shudder]" - ir
"But, Jost isn't ..." - Annys
"It was quote-worthy, dammit! Trust us." - Violet
"Hey. Nowhere in the Bible does it say 'you shall not lie with a lobster as you do with a woman.'" - Annys
Alys: "But what would be better is conducting an entire armor inspection in French."
ir:"Allors. Wearez-vous le cup?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kat: "One does not simply rock ..."
DeCastellan: "... into Concordia!"
ir: "It's good for them to be crotchless, so you can display the plaid."
Siobhan & Merricke: "Uh huh, 'display the plaid.'"
Siobhan: "If you know what I mean."
"This movie is great! What a gazebo!" - Siobhan
"How many lubes does Tadcaster need?" - Katya
"Strong enough for a man...made for a zookeeper." - Merricke
"What is that, the Prostate Tickle?" - Griff
"That's it! A musical that needs to happen: Samuel L. Jackson in Mercedes' Tush on a Plane." - Merricke
Katya: "I had been saying how the ground at Crown Tourney was spoogy."
Everyone else: "... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
Katya: "What! There was fluid involved, it was spoogy."
"SPON-gee. Spongy." - ir
Melchior: "Careful, Ian - you're damaging the napkin. Oh, wait...it's just the spoon's shadow..."
Bruno: "Did you say there's spooge on it?"
"See?? Not 'spoogy' now!!" - Siobhan
"The Japanese have some kind of morbid fascination with riding trees." - Merricke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"He has a 6" shaft with a 30" safety on it." - Collin
"Did you just say you like your women crispy?" - Andre
"I have had years of training in order to stand here and be an inanimate object." - Alys
"Oh no! Captain Man-boobs is coming at me!" - Katryne
Collin: "That chair has the gravity of the sun and Pascual's *ss is a giant gas planet."
Pascual: "Gas giant, baby!"
"Wait, the shovel is coming." - Alys
"It's good to be Pascual." - Pascual
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"My butt cheeks hurt." - Lissa
"He's the King! His coin has two heads." - Nigel
"The only thing supporting you is the breast." - Siobhan (not really)
"It's so long, I can wrap it around twice. That's a lot of girth to wrap." - delbroc
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Thank God it's pitch dark and I'm inside a plastic box, otherwise this would be embarrassing." - Merricke
"I was trying to put it in the wrong hole. That's why it wouldn't go in." - Bruni
"Wheeeeeeee!!! ... Aaaaaagh!!!" - Bruni, Lillia, ir and Violet
"Ooh! 'Goats for sale'." - Lillia
"Taxidermist! Hm. For when we're done with the goat..." - ir
"Have some poooo." - Lillia
"So, you need to protect your hole, because there are five people trying to get in." - Bruni
Katya: "We're known for going some places other people don't."
Lillia: "Oh, we go lots of places other people don't."
Judith the Confused: "Your Majesty! When was the last time you drank?"
HRM Griffith: [pause] "... Well, I put down a few last night..."
Judith: "Here. Drink."
"Well, she has a French accent, I have Scottish ears!" - Katya
Tanaka: "Oh, great. Of all things, Tanaka's become a pickle-licker."
ir: [coughs, sputters] "Whaat?!?"
Tanaka: "I said, 'Oh, great. Tanaka's become a pick-up line'."
ir: "Well, that's better than what I heard, but not by much."
"Awww, check it out...I've been wearing this backwards all day." - ir
"I have period underwear. Pull my cord!" - Violet, as Ian
ir: "I don't even know what a 'corf' is... don't pull that."
Violet: "It might hurt."
ir: "Oh, I'm huge in Japan."
Bruni, Lillia and Violet: insane laughter
"It had chunks. In a good way." - Lillia
"This? This is meat. Seriously. Back off, man." - Violet's take-out container
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I don't know why they don't just jump on Dr. Strange and just get to it." - Collin
"Oh, that movie's already getting raped." - Griff
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"We are Tadcaster. We have garters." - Bruni
"I'm playing with hats today! Lots of 'em!" - HRM Lucan
"Take a knee. Sit on the little tyger there." - HRM Lucan
"In this dress, a fistful is hard." - Tatiana
"I've spent the last hour beating everyone's meat." - Istvan
"All I can say is, at least I got humped by Thorson." - Tatiana
"I'd rather use a hammer, then they go squeak." - Tatiana
"Remind me when we get home... Malcolm needs a spanking." - Alys
"Ah, Brazil... where all the nut-butter comes from." - Don Christian
"'Lubing the Buddha'? Sounds like an oy-kido position - which should include a half-lotus in there, and maybe some hand gestures." - Alexandre
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I have Tourette's of the leg. UHHHHHHHH." - Merricke
"That's t-o-u-r-e-t-t-e-s." - Siobhan
"I must be losing my touch...my being an a** was trumped by your being helpful." - Merricke
"The only thing I heard was 'blah blah blah banana hammock blah blah'." - Griff
Siobhan: "Like 'f***'."
ir: "Yes. Exactly."
"For we are the very picture of innocence. Gaze upon us." - ir & Siobhan
"Really, it's like a vibrating bed." - Lissa
"Rectangle says go, so GOOOOO!!!" - Rowan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"What are you, Don Ian of Chippendales now?" - André
"Sorry. I have nuts in my mouth. ... Oh, I knew that would be trouble when it popped out." - Collin
"Mahket Day at Birker? That event was wickit pissah." - Stand-in Artotrius
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm thinking, 'Does he have a point?' Then, 'Non, it's Alain.'" - Bruni
"Shhh! Don't tell anyone – I don't actually fence much, it's mostly pizza in this bag." - Kat
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I never thought I'd use the word 'issuant' in polite conversation..." - Lillia
"Pushtard." - collective
Lillia: "It all magically becomes turkey, but only when Ian's there."
ir: "See, it's like this Hormel platter here, with cheese, turkey, and...turkey."
Lillia: "No, Ian, that's all cheese."
ir: "... So it is. Yay!"
Kat: "The Muppet Show? Does that ring a bell?"
Lissa: "I know what a bell is..."
Kat: "Yeah, but does it ring one of yours?"
"It's like they're Black Beauty or King of the Wind, where they're they're horribly abused and then they end in someone's plaster." - Kat
Lissa: "She's giving the brownies that 'come hither' look."
Kat: "Did it work?"
Lissa: "Apparently."
"I'll never be able to look at anyone who limps in the same way again." - Kat
"DAMN you for bringing that up again." - Marion
"He wants to show you he has use of all of his fingers." - Kat
"My 'love you' motor's goin'." - Kat
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I crotch-shot my newbie." - Lillia
"I was gonna ask if anybody knew a good reason to have wires and a magnet shoved up your butt." - Collin
Hans' wife: "Tadcaster? You mean like tadbagging?"
Hans: "What? Tadbagging?"
Hans' wife: "You know, like teabagging, but with Tads."
"Is that like... Nadcaster?" - Griff
"What's important is that you feel good about how you fenced. Now get off my list." - Merricke
Griff: "'Kiss Me, I'm Tadish.'"
Lillia: "Ewww! ... Is that a come-on?"
Avelina: "Y'know, he wasn't gonna write that down until you said, 'Ewww.'"
"We've been in the 'ewww' place several times tonight." - ir
Griff: "You're a dirty girl."
Lillia: [in a small voice] "I am!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm from New Jersey. Segues are for pussies." - Griff
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Okay… there's a piano up my *ss." - Collin
"If it starts smoking, you're doing it wrong." - Master Griffyn ap Madoc
"I dunno. 'She-wan' just sounds like she should be played by Pam Grier in
a 1970s blaxploitation movie." - Alys
"[gasp] That's why cheese is funny! - Violet
"It's a Brunian eye-spoon." - del bruc
"Yeah, there's my new badge: fieldless, a Thomas, a scabbard issuant into mouth." - Lillia
"How do you blazon something going into something else?" - Merrick
"Hyper-nemesis!" - del bruc
"Do not use if patient has mega-colon." - del bruc
"I've lost all willpower after the home proctology kit..." - Merricke
"Well, I'm gonna go find a lap to jump in." - Lillia
"Ah, I will French-look your royal progress." - Bruni
Arden: [plucks "Paint It Black" on fiddle]
HRM Lucan: "No. I see a red door, I say 'Leave it red!'"
Arden: "Yes, Your Majesty."
Avelina: "But it's 'I see a red door and I want to paint it black...'"
HRM Lucan: "No, if you see a red door, leave it the heck alone."
ir: "Don't correct the King."
"Nice hat!" - HRM Lucan
HRM Lucan: "I hear you do things."
Bruni: "You have proof?"
HRM Lucan: "OK, everyone know what We're doing here?"
Populace: "YES!"
HRM Lucan: "And you all think this is a good idea?"
Populace: "YES!"
HRM Lucan: "And does Philadelphia know what's going on here?"
Populace and Philadelphia: "NO!"
"Two words: Stripper. Dodgeball." - ir
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"There's an email list for cream hos?" - ir
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"I don't know why Bruni wants Lissa to hump her OGRs. Or...why Bruni has some in her pocket." - Griff
Berric shall now be 'Joint Manipulatiuon Expert, Nautical.'" - Griff
Lissa: "I heard 'orcs.'"
ir: "Yes. Mechanically separated orcs are what's in Spam."
"Caaaw!! -fwip-" - ir
Berric: "I'm just trying not to laugh."
Griff: "Because it hurts?"
Berric: "No, because I'll die."
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"He must have been practicing in the bathroom for months..." - Kat
"He's been practicing on the little dog." - Kat
"...and there is muppet sex." - Alys
"I wanna be federally protected!" - Lissa
"Heh. Periwinkle-boy put himself into nipple-biting range." - ir
"Wow, Lillia needs it hard." - Diana
"Meat holds heat." - Kat
"Hey, Your Majesty, where'd you leave your King's Champion? *be-boop* Oh, there he is." - Marion
Annie: tumbles down stairs, laughing
Griff: "What are you doing?"
Annie: "I don't know, falling?"
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"How did he stab me in the back? He's standing in front of me!" - Mel
"I had to get down on my knees to cram myself in." - Merricke
"I know, it sounded like 'chicken f***er.'" - Merricke
"Wait, is this real life?" - Siobhan
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"I can't stop doing it! I can't turn off the 'f***' switch!" - Lillia
"No, Viagra makes you feel guilt with a raging hard-on." - Merricke
"People will have fun, or I will beat them." - Bruni
Bruni: "Ewww...he's rubbing his Microsoft."
Siobhan: "Wow, it's a geek sex joke."
Lillia: "That's why it's not that funny."
"Under 'subtle' in the dictionary, it says, 'anything but that.'" - Griff, to ir
Jane: "Iaaannnn..."
ir: "I'm not milking anything."
Merricke: "Do you have to finger all my fries?"
Bruni: "Do you mind?"
Merricke: "Well, no."
"No, he's going to sleep with my helmet." - ir
"You had a Marion-Thomas sampler?" - Griff
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Bruni: "Scads of French neutering...sounds scary."
Katryne: "At least it's not Nads of French Neutering, that sounds like leftovers."
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"Das ÜÜÜÜÜberloob!!!" - quotes from K&Q Rapier